Dec
24
Let's see. I've been too bored/lazy/uncaring to even blog lately. I've had inspiration hit me on and off but as my mom tells me time and time again, i am so inconsistent with everything i attempt to do (i can't find the right word actually so inconsistent shall do for now). Frankly, i agree but i don't care, it'll probably be my demise and obstacle to achieve success and all that but you can't miss what you don't have right? (Im being stupid and hard-headed but it's that's my mood and you're reading my blog.)
According to Wikipedia, "Children with much older siblings (generally ten or more years) may also have a similar family environment to only children." and "In Western culture, only children are often subject to a stereotype that equates them with spoiled brats." Those two sentences just about sums up my life.
See how cynical im feeling right now? Yes im feeling irritated and angry and all that jazz so that's why im blogging. That's why i ever blog. To let out my feelings...be it irritation, hurt, anger, happiness, relief etc etc. It's usually a combination of two or more and without the absence of hurt. The stupid mindless emotion i control every day but it still manages to eat at my insides.
The above (quoted stuff?) were supposed to be my status update at FB. But guess what? I've got some compassion left somewhere to not to ruin everybody else's Christmas Eve. That, and im a coward. I don't want my brothers seeing that.
I've had a bad day. Guess what, bad days are always my constant companion during the holidays. No normal relaxing fun-filled holidays for me. Uh uh. And today, is officially the worst ever possible day-before-birthday day. If that makes any sense.
I got in a fight with my mom. We get in fights day in and day out but hell, tomorrow is my birthday. I KNEW it would be the worst birthday ever in my whole (almost) 17 years of life on this demented earth. But great, here i am on a partially working laptop, in my room, at 10pm, having not eaten since 10am and no water left in my water bottle. And here i thought tomorrow's party full of old people would be the worst of my problems.
A whole party full of people i don't care about ( and who aren't even here for me), chattering bout old people stuff, with food i eat every day and rather dislike - whoopee. Enough of my ranting, might rant somemore after the dreaded party.
Guess what i need now.
A bowl of Maggie.
Wish me luck =/
A bowl of Maggie.
Wish me luck =/